Over the past decade, I have greatly admired the work of Dr. Lucy Hone, co-director of the New Zealand Institute of Wellbeing and Resilience. I’m fortunate to know Lucy (and her co-director, Dr. Denise Quinlan) personally and had the privilege of contributing a chapter to their recent book, The Educators’ Guide to Whole-School Wellbeing.
Today, I’ve chosen Lucy’s empowering book, Resilient Grieving: How to Find Your Way Through Devastating Loss, as my book recommendation. My choice feels especially fitting as three copies I ordered to gift to grieving neighbours arrived today.
Lucy’s book is a compassionate guide that redefines the grieving process, offering practical tools to navigate loss while fostering resilience. Drawing from her personal experience of losing her 12-year-old daughter, Abi, alongside her expertise as a resilience researcher, Lucy provides a framework for coping with profound sorrow. She challenges traditional views of grief, advocating for a proactive, strength-based approach that incorporates emotional flexibility, self-compassion, and hope.
Throughout the book, Lucy emphasises the power of small, daily choices in finding purpose and meaning after loss, encouraging readers to focus on what helps (and avoid what hinders) their healing. Sadly, grief touches all our lives. Recently, our family has been deeply connected to several tragic events. For Jeanette and me, leaning into relationships, holding loved ones in our thoughts and prayers, and—when the time feels right—turning to the wisdom of others like Lucy, has been essential to our coping.
We hope Lucy’s book may serve as a valuable resource for you or those you care about.
If a book feels too much right now, I also recommend Lucy’s powerful TED Talk, Three Secrets of Resilient People, which has become one of the most watched TED Talks in recent years.